Even if you make an obvious social mistake, people probably don’t hold it against you. In fact, they may sympathize – everyone knows what it’s like to feel awkward or not know what to say. You can get perspective by reading websites or blogs about people who are in your shoes. See how they managed tough situations.
Reduce perfectionism by practicing making mistakes. Intentionally, make a grammatical error on a social media post or informal email. Leave your home slightly messy for a few days. Notice that the world doesn’t end and people don’t think any less of you for making these minor mistakes. [5] X Research source
If, for example, you know being in large crowds is problematic for you, do not start by trying to get yourself to give a public speech. Instead, progressively introduce yourself to larger social gatherings in settings where you don’t have to be the center of attention. Instead of focusing on what makes you anxious, ask yourself, “what aspect of this activity or situation causes me the most anxiety?” Focus on working within that limit first, and slowly work out from there.
Beating yourself up for past mistakes doesn’t do any good in the long run. It just makes you more afraid to make mistakes in the future, which prevents you from growing as a person. If you find yourself returning to the embarrassing moment after the fact, remind yourself that you already forgave yourself and moved past it.
Replace your negative thoughts with neutral or positive ones. For instance, if you find yourself thinking “I’m so embarrassing around other people,” reframe it to, “I’m feeling self-conscious right now,” or switch your focus to a personal quality you’re proud of.
Look for a therapist who has experience treating people with anxiety.
It’s a myth that smoking cigarettes calms you down. While a cigarette may create a brief calming sensation by relieving your nicotine craving, smoking actually increases your overall anxiety. [11] X Trustworthy Source National Health Service (UK) Public healthcare system of the UK Go to source
Deep breathing is a relaxation technique that anyone can try in the moment. Simply, pull in air through your nose. Hold it briefly. Then, let the air out slowly from your mouth. Repeating this exercise can help calm your entire body down when anxiety strikes. Progressive muscle relaxation involves going over your whole body, taking turns contracting and releasing tension from each muscle group. You might start at your toes, contract them briefly, and then release the tension. Then, move to the next muscle group until your whole body is more relaxed. Try out several different relaxation techniques to figure out which ones work best for you. Include these exercises as a regular part of your day to fight off anxiety before it starts, and to manage anxiety when it happens.
Aerobic exercise is best for improving your mood, but any type of regular physical activity will benefit you mentally and physically.
Getting more magnesium, zinc, and omega-3 fatty acids in your diet may help lower your anxiety levels. You can get these essential vitamins and nutrients from green leafy vegetables, nuts and seeds, and cold-water fish like salmon.
You might ask your family doctor or therapist for a recommendation to a local support group. You can also search for groups online. [16] X Research source
Start with small, low-pressure interactions, such as asking for directions or making small talk with a cashier. Work your way up to more anxiety-inducing situations, such as introducing yourself to strangers at a party. Social skills get rusty if you don’t use them, so try to talk to someone new every day.
For example, if you are in conversation and find yourself worrying if the other person is judging you, focus on making them smile or telling them what you know about a certain topic. Turn your full attention to them and you’ll feel less anxious about yourself.
Ask questions that require more than a yes or no answer. For instance, a good question might be, “How did you get into your current line of work?” Avoid asking intrusive questions. Keep it light and positive.
Reframe awkward moments as victories. If you feel uncomfortable, it means you’re making progress.
