Don’t try to make your friends guess how you feel. If you smile and laugh on the outside, but secretly wish they’d stop, it’s up to you to be more straightforward about the effect their teasing has on you. If your friends usually treat you well and respect your feelings, they will be glad you said something, and they’ll probably stop teasing you right away.
When you bring up the teasing with your friends, use an assertive tone. Assertiveness helps with honest communication and helps cultivate genuine relationships. It allows you to be absolutely clear about your needs. [2] X Research source Being assertive isn’t the same as being condescending or rude. There is nothing rude about politely telling them how you feel. Start your discussion with phrases such as “I don’t like it when you tease me because…” or “Your teasing makes me feel…” Be honest and direct without any intentions of hurting or offending your friends.
Communication is also a two-way street. Be receptive to getting feedback from your friends. They will be more willing to listen to you if you’re willing to listen to them in return. Ask follow-up questions such as “how does that make you feel?” in order to understand any feelings or reactions your friends may be going through. Deep talks on subjects that feel personal can lead to even better friendships.
When the subject of your crush comes up, don’t reveal your feelings; you’ll just give them more fodder for teasing. Consider talking about your crush only with people you trust not to use the information to get laughs.
Make the conversation less about you and more about them. Ask questions about their day, any plans they may have for the weekend, or about the latest movie they watched. Be excited about what they are saying in order to encourage them to keep talking more about them and less about you and your crush. Encourage your friends to open up. Ask them about the love interest in their life or if they have their eye on someone. Your interest can make them feel comfortable with expressing themselves about what’s going on in their lives.
Tell your friends, “I don’t want to talk about that right now. " Shrug, then turn it around and bring up one of their boyfriends/girlfriends. Act like you didn’t hear what they said, and change the subject entirely.
For example, if your friend is a huge sports fan, bring up their favorite player/team or recap last night’s sports highlights. Friendly banter about whose player/team is the best can help switch the conversation gears to more pleasant conversation.
Be as cool about the situation as you can. Even if you may feel uneasy about your friends’ teasing on the inside, your confidence and carefree attitude will show them that their words and/or actions won’t throw you off your crushing game. [5] X Expert Source Cameron Gibson, R. C. C. Registered Clinical Counsellor & Program Director Expert Interview. 10 February 2021. Deflect with humor if you’re having difficulty with ignoring your friends’ teasing. Come up with a witty phrase or comeback that lets your friends know that their teasing is nothing more than a laughing matter.
Your friends will still more than likely bug you about spilling the beans about you and your crush. Share only the details that you’re comfortable with sharing. You could even tell them that you don’t have a crush on the person anymore.
As a last resort, you could even tell your friends that you don’t want to spend time with them anymore because of their behavior. If your friends apologize and want to earn back your trust, it’s up to you whether you want to give them another chance. It could be a learning experience for both you and your friends. If you feel that the teasing has gone past the point of playfulness and into bullying territory, tell your parents or another trusted adult. You deserve to be treated well by your peers, so don’t be afraid to seek help if you need it. [6] X Trustworthy Source StopBullying. gov Website run by the U. S. Department of Health and Human Services providing information related to identifying and preventing bullying Go to source
